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To help you guys out, I talked to people who sleep with men to find out what they like most when it comes to initiating sex. And in sex it would be so nice to feel like I can let go of that, to feel like someone else is taking charge and taking care In talking to 18 sex-havers, the biggest themes to emerge were checking in for consent and being more verbal overall.

Additionally, many people I talked to expressed that it was mega-hot when their partner demonstrated desire for them specifically as opposed to just being a ball of horniness who needs to come. Consider setting the mood with dirty talk. As long as they're sincere, there's no such thing as too many.

I wish my partner would be more verbal, more complimentary, etc. A real kinda playfulness, not a structured plan or anything.

I know he is physically attracted to me, but I want to be reminded more consistently. I worry I sound egotistical but knowing he finds me attractive turns me on. It might sound boring but I think him being forward and leading the situation is the fantasy.

Sometimes, actions litrle louder than words. Or brush my hair for more than three seconds. This never happens. It makes me feel appreciated, hot, and wanted! The most common answer by far?

Clear communication. End of story. How does that feel?

So put some time into getting it right with your partner. It'll be worth it.